2011 blog posts

12-25-11: MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!  My husband Rob and I have too many blessings to count  - our health, healthy families, amazing and true friends, wonderful dogs and a safe home, jobs that we both love and dreams ahead of us that motivate and excite us.  God has TRULY blessed us and we are so grateful - today and everyday.  

There's a lot of snow on the ground still left from Thursday's snowstorm, so we rounded up some friends and dug out the MTBs for a super chill spin on the path in and around Bear Creek Lake Park.  The sun was shining on us and we pretty much had the park all to ourselves.  It was beautiful!  A great way to spend Christmas day!

  <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/61684042">Imported Garmin Route (12/25/2011)</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Morrison, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Morrison, CO</a>

 12-13-11: today, i rode down the road where my front tire blew out (and i crashed hard) at the end of august. I was terrified... I haven't been able to bring myself to ride that stretch until today. Brought up some strange emotions as I reflected on what that crash cost me in terms of goals and dreams ... Interestingly, my reading material tonight included this excerpt: "the challenges we face are not meant to destroy us. They are designed to make us more capable of fulfilling our God-given assignments." #fullcircle

12-5-11: I feel much progress has been made lately on my back and things are looking up!  I'm enjoying the art of ENJOYING my bike and riding.  We got in a nice chill 3 hour ride on Thanksgiving in near 70-degree weather it was wonderful.  Alas, nothing else to report -so I thought I'd share my friend Katie's blog post about cold, skiing and running out of coffee (3 things I also try to avoid myself):

 http://crankymommys.blogspot.com/2011/12/my-precioussssssssssssssssssss.html?spref=fb

11-23-11: our team kits arrived!!  I have never been this excited to see the UPS man -- we got our 2012 threads before thankgiving!!  ... It's going to be a fantastic season.

11-22-11: I almost feel silly for having a blog anymore, because it's not about bike race adventures or accolades, it's just a woman musing about life, same as the next person.  But - maybe what I've learned this year can be useful to those who read it and so for that reason I'll keep posting until my website subscription expires ;)

... it is Thanksgiving week, a perfect time to reflect on all the things I am grateful for. 

Despite all of the setbacks and pain and heartbreak of 2011, I can honestly say I'm grateful everything happened the way it did.  The blessings that have flowed from the things I initially perceived as punishments have been unbelievable.  I won't get into all the details because it's not really to be shared on a blog.  But what I will say is that my body and mind and heart are the happiest and healthiest they've been in a long, long time.  Taking time off the bike and delving deep into some of the issues in my body has been truly eye opening.  I'm getting back to a balanced state and it feels magical.  Things that were neglected for years are finally addressed.  I kept pressing on, pressing on, ignoring things because I was so goal-oriented: I couldn't stop or slow down because I wanted the next win or to make the team or whatever it was.  Drive drive drive.  Until the wheels fall off- which I now know, they did.  I'd literally forgotten what it felt like to wake up in the morning and not have back pain the moment I got out of bed. 

Crashing wasn't fun.  Certainly not 3 times inside of 4 months.  But it's funny how my collarbone injury has allowed me to relate with clients and even a teammate who recently broke hers.  But-for my own personal experience, I wouldn't be able to relate to them-or any of my clients undergoing surgery for that matter.  Surgery is a humbling experience -you lose control over what happens to you and you entrust someone else and you hope and pray it works out the way it's supposed to.  Being in the ambulance and the ER were good experiences for me too ... I think I do a much better job for my clients now that I went through that.  And -the time spent in pain was also a powerful lesson, to never take a healthy body for granted.  I've learned so much from this experience.     

I have made some wonderful new friends; in turn I have removed from my sphere of influence, those individuals who never had my best interests at heart to begin with.  Having a supportive spouse and loving parents has helped me through this year, and now with true friendship in my life, I feel like I could survive any setback.     

I have begun to pour my energies into people I believe in, and efforts I feel truly matter.  And the return on these investments is so invigorating.  Being forced off the bike and out of the "pro bike scene" has given me the chance to see things from a different perspective, to re-prioritize. 

Our women's team recruited and we grew from 4 to 18 beginner women on my new cycling team.  Seeing it through their eyes -as brand new cyclists - it's made the sport fun for me again.   Teaching and mentoring seems to be the direction in which God is continually prodding me.  And I'm loving it. The energy exchange is so positive.  In fact -here's an email one of the girls sent me today, which I will treasure forever:

I just wanted to wish you a Happy Thanksgiving. And, I just wanted to tell you how very thankful I am for you, for meeting you, and for having my back or should I say collarbone when I crashed. I feel so blessed just to know you and look forward to all that I am learning and will learn from you. You are an Angel! THANK-YOU!

I'm also blessed to run my own business, which has experienced tremendous growth this year.  If you believe (as I do), that the areas of abundance in your life are probably where God wants you to focus your energies, then clearly, He's telling me I should be working more and racing my bike less ;)  I'm so lucky to be my own boss in a practice with an ever-expanding caseload.  I'm grateful that I had a degree before I discovered cycling.  I appreciated having a job --most pro cyclists just have cycling, and then nothing --if they get hurt.  I say every day, I'm so lucky to do something that I love for a living.  My clients' experiences (most are cycling accidents, with a cyclist injured by a motorist) continually remind me that life as we know it can change in an instant.  One moment we're out riding our bikes, enjoying a sunny day, and the next, we can be severely injured, scarred for life, paralyzed, missing work, accruing bills and debt. 

It is not just a trite statement, it's my new life mantra: live every moment, gratefully, in the present.

Happy Thanksgiving. 

11-10-11: I'm back on a training plan.  An actual schedule, which makes me so happy.  I survived my first boot camp class this week at Rock Hard Fitness (oh my gosh I'm still so sore!).  It is a firefighter-based and taught class involving weighted fire hoses, semi truck tires and really heavy medicine balls.  It definitely challenged me, but the part that made me happiest is that my body could handle it.  I also taught my first spin classes of the winter at treads and Rock Hard this week.  It's been a great week.  We had a team meeting last Sunday which also included CPR certification for anyone that wanted it.  We got a bit off task at the end, during which time I pointed out that my baby was the best because it could do CPR on the other babies.  Perhaps we were all very tired, but it seemed hilarious at the time.  Laughing with my team - life is good.

11-4-11: thanks to 303cycling for another opportunity to run an article about cycling!

http://303cycling.com/what-cyclists-should-know-about-insurance

11-1-11: it's an exciting week!  Doc says I can start riding 2 x 30 min sessions/day on the trainer.  You can't imagine how much I'm enjoying those sessions.  Feels good to be active again, even if it's in small doses.

Winter is here, we've already had a big snow (last week -approx 6 inches) and for some reason this year, I'm really enjoying it.  I think the biggest reason is the fact that I missed most of last winter being out in LA or traveling to the world cups all winter long.  Let me just say that I am SO GLAD I'm able to be home this winter, and can enjoy the holiday season and all the fun that I missed last year.  I'm so glad I don't have to leave Rob and the pups for weeks at a time.  Those were good experiences and I'm glad I did them, but I'm even more grateful for the opportunity to be home this winter.  Business is picking up too, which is awesome. 

And -after a year off from spin class instruction, I'm back at it and I'm EXCITED to start these up again!  Saturday mornings and Wednesday nights.  Can't wait for the large groups of motivated cyclists all sweating together and pushing each other, to the tune of nice loud music ;) Come join me!

10-22-11: took a very fast 2.5 day trip to Sioux Falls to visit my grandmother and also see my parents, who were visiting her at the time.  Had an enjoyable time driving by the places we used to go when we lived there (my elementary school years), including our old house and my schools.  We also made a trip to the falls, which were very pretty:

On the flight home I had a "revelation" which I posted to facebook as this:

it just hit me. While recovering from my injuries and coping w/pain, some amazing friendships have developed in my life. My faith has grown. My attention has been drawn from competitive cycling to things/people who REALLY matter. #everythinghappensforareason

Today I set up a booth at Veloswap to promote my law practice and also our women's cycling team (which is GROWING!).  It was a long day but very productive and fun. 

10-19-11: this process of getting well with my Chiro's help is pretty fascinating -I mean, I would find it more interesting if it wasn't my body we were dissecting and it wasn't my pain causing me so much grief ;) But still -it's been educational and eye opening.  Last week we began really focusing on this sciatica-type pain and symptoms I have in my right leg.  It aches so badly after sitting or standing that I feel I'll lose my mind.  He found a knot in my upper hamstring that he thought was the result of the last crash, perhaps the top tube or seat smacking my muscle causing a mass of scar tissue to form, which could lead to sciatica-type pain.  So he got in there and broke it up.  But-the symptoms persisted. 

Next we moved to my Piriformis.  This is a large muscle in the glute area, that can actually cause "psuedo-sciatic" symptoms because it lays right over the sciatic nerve.  Sure enough, once Dr Steve got in there he found all kinds of issues -again, the likely result of crashing on my right hip (or it could've also just resulted from overuse: "Overuse injury resulting in piriformis syndrome can result from activities performed in the sitting position that involves strenuous use of the legs as in rowing/sculling and bicycling").  The upside to this is that we've 99% ruled out disc issues in my back causing the sciatic nerve flare up.  I've passed all of Dr Steve's disc/nerve tests, so we think it truly is a muscle issue.  And -same for my lower back problems.  Muscular.  Particularly one spot on my lower left side where the muscle gets tight as a rod.  The deeper we get into it and break things up, the better it is feeling. 

So while the bodywork is extremely painful, we are "peeling back the layers" like we would an onion, eventually, we'll get it resolved to the point where we can go super deep and won't find pain or problems. I can't wait.

The lesson: when you crash or have a traumatic event happen to your body, you can't just leave it be.  The body will heal, but it may heal wrong.  Scar tissue forms between the ropy-muscle fibers and tendons, and once those masses form, the body responds poorly and the muscles fire at less than their potential, or in the wrong ways.  It causes other areas to overcompensate, which leads to overuse or imbalance.  It takes adjustments and bodywork to get in there.  Even acupuncture is ineffective when it comes to deep knots like mine. 

I remain optimistic.  I feel like progress is being made.  I am down to short walks for activity, that's it.  It's amazing how my appetite increases and my sleep quality decreases when I'm not exercising.  But I view this as a short step backwards necessary to improve my overall health. 

10-14-11: this won't be my most uplifting post ever-so -you've been warned.   

Do you know what happens when the dust settles?  When the endorphins that interval workouts produces, stop? When the adrenaline-filled descents and races become a thing of the past? When the highs and satisfactions of stellar performance and pushing yourself to your limits, end? When the time you spent preparing to train, training, or recovering from training, becomes filled with inactivity, sorrow and pain?  When the fitness -the muscle- the low bodyfat -the tone -the endurance --that you spent years working to improve -slowly fades away?  When your goals go from world class performance, to wanting to race pain free, to just wanting to ride pain free, to just wanting to live pain free? 

I will tell you - it is a dark, depressing place.  And it is testing me in ways I have never been tested. 

In all my years of athletic competition -the highs and lows, the injuries, the hard painful lessons learned, the heart break when coaches, teammates, or sponsors let me down ... nothing prepared me for what i've been dealing with the past few months.  Since that third crash at the end of August, my health has taken a nose dive.  I thought time away from rigorous training would reward me with renewed energy and a healthy back.  Instead, new pains have developed.  Riding less has rewarded me with more pain -- a truly sick and cruel lesson.  I am no closer to finding the cause -or solution -to my physical pain than I was. I now have sciatica-like symptoms that make me want to cut my leg off.  It is beyond frustrating. 

I not only stopped riding, but I've had to stop pretty much everything else.  Even the yoga that I thought might help me heal, seems to be causing more bad than good.  I am left with walking my dogs and sleeping.  Sleep is the only time that my pain goes away, so I find myself looking forward to the evenings, when I can lay down, and go to sleep, and leave the pain for a few hours.  This business of living with chronic pain is truly a test.  It affects every.single.aspect.of.my.life. 

I can already tell you that if -someday - these maladies are cured, I will never again take having a healthy body for granted.  To wake up without pain and to live the day without pain -never again will I fail to give thanks for those days. 

I understand now why athletes who retire often come back to the sport.  It's because when you stop, there's a huge void in your life.  And it aches.  The pit of your stomach and your heart just ache.  I'm hopeful some day this will all be a distant memory.  But I'm beginning to face reality that it may not.  I know remaining optimistic will help my chances.  So I'm staying positive.  Only time will tell...

richroll: When things aren't going according to (my) plan - obstacles - I have to remember its just another opportunity to let go, surrender and grow 

10-6-11: Steve Jobs -on love and loss- really struck a chord with me, as his comments mirror my sentiments about cycling: I was rejected, but I really love it.

Start at 5:30 for love and loss:

 http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/nationnow/2011/10/vintage-video-steve-jobs-shares-lessons-on-life-loss-love-and-death-.html

10-5-11: I had my weekly appointment with Dr Steve at ProActive on Monday and he thought we better take some full spine xrays (front and side) to try and figure out what's going on with my back.  Wow the results were quite surprising. 

He got out his ruler and started measuring things on my xray - as the photo shows, he measured the difference in height between the top of my iliac crests - one side was noticably higher than the other.  Also, my spine did not line up with the bottom of my pubic bone -they are misaligned by about a 1/2 cm!  And my pelvic girdle/lower lumbar are also rotated.  The facets on my lower vertebrae are all turned to the right (instead of pointing straight out).  Additionally, he noticed some compression in my neck and upper cervical vertabrae.  And my neck curves the opposite way it's supposed to.  He attributes this to me working on a laptop since law school (causes me to look down) and cycling-especially the TT position (head down, neck scrunched and looking ahead).  So...there's some work ahead for us.  Traction, adjustments, stretching ... so on.  I've been spending some quality time on our inversion table here at home and hope it helps.

I'm just relieved to have a professional think of this step -thank goodness he had the idea to do this now and diagnose specific issues -but why has no one done this before for me??  And I'm relieved to know the pains aren't in my head - a pelvic girdle that's tilted and rotated will definitely cause my back muscles to spasm.  So now I feel good knowing maybe there's a plan of attack we can follow and possibly get this resolved.  Riding has become no fun for me anymore since almost any ride causes back pain.  And I can't keep getting cortisone shots, even though they work, it only lasts 8-10 weeks. 

So ... I'm optimistic.  I also did my first yoga class yesterday -haven't done yoga since before my collarbone break -and it held in all the poses and the stretching felt really good.  I realized all the injuries and tumultuous season led to me ignoring my flexibility and I've grown very INflexible!!  So I'm looking forward to more classes at this new studio just up the road from my house - just another step towards getting my body fixed and healthy again. 

I enjoyed a nice chill ride today with my friend Katie -she's a blast to ride with, though I think she prefers riding FAST and not my current slow speed ;)  I'm realizing it's so much more fun to ride w/friends than to ride alone!! 

9-29-11:  looking forward to 2012 ...

9-27-11: so we went mountain biking (again) last weekend with a nice large group of friends -this time, to buffalo creek.  Again I was promised it was "non-technical" so of course, I wasn't surprised when I found it to be technical (for me, everything feels like a black diamond run!).  And I also realized 23 miles on a MTB is forever ;)  Again -whole new appreciation for leadville 100 riders ...

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/51998294">Imported Garmin Route (09/25/2011)</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Conifer, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Conifer, CO</a>

This week is track nats, and I won't be there.  Probably don't need to tell you that it smarts and stings in all kinds of weird ways. 

 9-22-11: this article of mine recently ran on 303cycling, thought i'd share it here for blog readers: http://303cycling.com/who-picks-up-the-tab-in-a-bike-crash

9-20-11: I rec'd this email in response to my email/post about calling it quits on my season and wanted to share it, because it epitomizes the support and love I've been receiving from sponsors and supporters - (when I wrongly assumed people would call me a quitter and say I'd given up) -in fact, the outpouring of kind emails has been just the opposite and it's reinforced to me that I made the right decision:

"I'm proud of you Megan. Life delivers hard lessons and our choice is always to perservere and learn them or to continue beating against them and getting lost in the fight. When people talk abut perserverance we assume that it means we keep going against all odds to get to the goal. It's not always that - sometimes perserverance is really learning how to walk away from something we're not supposed have now (or possibly ever) while maintaining who we are and growing into who we are yet meant to be. Rest. Rejuvenate. God speed."

9-12-11: yesterday Rob and our neighbors talked me into an "easy" MTB ride.  Easy meaning the riding wasn't too challenging but not easy for me in terms of the technical sections and mtb technique -something i'm still very green at.  In fact our neighbors told me "oh this is where I recovered from my heart surgery when I couldn't get my heart rate up." - so I was thinking, rolling single track, fire roads, I can handle that.  Yeah right!  Rocky sections, roots -all the things that scare me most.  Surprisingly, I was able to get over about 80% of what we rode, though I did hike-a-bike anytime I felt it was too much for me.  It was really fun to leave the road bike and road rides and to escape to cooler, higher elevation and to do something completely challenging. 

 the views are amazing!

I find MTB is 90% terrifying and 10% exhilirating ;)  I do want to get better at it and maybe do a few races next year.  Love my cannondale scalpel, that thing rolls over just about everything.  I have a whole new appreciation for leadville 100 riders, when 8 miles took us 2 hours ;)

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/50212006">Imported Garmin Route (09/11/2011)</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Evergreen, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Evergreen, CO</a>

9-10-11: after last weekend's debaucle at the track I was forced to take stock of the injuries I'm battling, and found myself asking - "why am I pushing so hard when my body just needs a chance to heal?"  After 3 crashes on my head, there is a nerve in my neck that is unhappy causing numbness and tingling in my right arm.  My right wrist and thumb are still very painful.  My collarbone has been irritable ever since that day when I heard the pop -- as it turned out, it wasn't scar tissue breaking loose, it was part of the bone pulling free from the hardware.  Both of my hips hurt from landing on them in the last 2 crashes.  My elbows and shoulders look like I was pulled from a burning building.  It's not pretty.

I'm finally free of all my bandaids, but my body is wrecked.  I started to feel like my workouts were quicksand -the harder I worked, the deeper the hole became that I just couldn't dig out from.  Track nationals at the end of this month have been my biggest goal all year long and it took me a while to come to terms with walking away.  I have this one body that has to last me another 60 years or so.  In a nutshell - My long term visions for my life trumped my short term goals in cycling.  Seems simple.  But for a goal-oriented person like me, it wasn't an easy conclusion to reach.  It is hard to keeping loving a sport that has delivered so much heartache and pain. 

The torch isn't extinguished ... I'm just hanging it up for now.

This past week has been a really fun week.  I rode when I wanted to ride, I didn't ride when I didn't want to.  And somewhat spontaneously -we adopted a puppy from the local shelter (dog #3) - Ramsey, a 4mo old collie mix.  She's given me a reason to go on long walks, relax outside in our yard, and to take my mind off the heartbreaks this season delivered, and the bitter disappointment of me losing my chance to fulfill my goals at nationals.

9-4-11: yesterday I pulled my longsleeve skinsuit on over all of my bandaids and tried my hand at a 3k pursuit -my first since July's crash.  Unluckily for me, the weather was not in my favor -winds were 20mph.  And yes, it was an outdoor velodrome.  My bigger concern was the shoulder's tolerance of a standing start -something I haven't been able to do since surgery.  I went about 80% at the start and then tried to "settle in" on the effort -hard to do while being blown about the track, down on the apron, up on the red line.  It was not pretty.  I did not stay for my time nor results. My collarbone was grumpy with me the rest of the day, though it was good to see it held together for the start ;)

8-29-11: If you believe this saying, then I have an abundance of fuel!

"We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey." ~Kenji Miyazawa

But seriously - I have THE most amazing sponsors and supporters.  After Saturday's crash I received this note by email from one of my most dedicated and special sponsors (I'm so grateful for his presence in my life!) and wanted to share- because it made my day and it gives me hope:

... However, often great things arise right after our darkest moments of despair. Something good must be about to happen with you. I will be praying for you. I’m sure God is pleased with how well you have handled all these hard things this past year. I sense that he is rejoicing over you for what he sees in you. One of your great strengths is that you are always grateful, hold on to your gratefulness even now and the dark clouds will soon move away ...

8-27-11: I truly couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.  730am this morning I was riding over to do the Lookout Mtn TT, my start time was 8:32 and my legs felt delish!  On a downhill section of the route I take to the mountain, for no apparent reason, my front tire blew and I found myself kissing the concrete at high speed.  Again.  Dejavu.  Except this time, mostly the right side took it, and my head of course.  Have been using this tire and this wheel for training every day for weeks without a single problem.  Had not rolled over any glass today -even now, I can't find anything wrong w/the tire.  Yet - it exploded and I went down so fast I didn't even know what happened until afterwards.  Super grateful my mom was there w/me and also for the 2 ladies riding by on their bikes- one of whom called her husband, who came and picked me up and took me home, THANK YOU.

Shredded my shorts front and back -and also my jersey.  Gloves, phone, ipod -everything took a beating today.  (oh and so did my flesh. friend calls me "street pizza")

8-25-11: I registered for Track nats today.  There is still some doubt as to whether my collarbone can handle a standing start - let alone 2 or 4 standing starts -so I hope it won't be money wasted when the time draws near.  But for now- my name is on the list.  All I can do is remain hopeful and wait.  Wait to heal, wait to see new xrays.  Wait and train.  Train until my eyeballs fall out. 

D-DAYS: September 29-30, 2011.

8-21-11: on a whim I found myself driving to a crit yesterday, nearly sick to my stomach with nerves and looking for any excuse to bail.  But -there I was standing on the start line.  I'm so glad I went!

8-19-11: Fort Collins Cycling Fest time trial: me vs Jeannie Longo

 

 finishing stretch

I arrived at the TT today to find that just one other woman had entered the 1/2/3 category (most chose to enter their age groups to have a chance at qualifying for the UCI world tour race in Belgium) -- and that one woman was none other than Longo.  If you've been following me/my blog for awhile you know that since 2007 I've been competing against her each time she travels to CO to race and train.  ....  But I digress.  My warmup was shoddy and nervous- my ipod slipped and my headphones were sheared off in my front wheel spokes.  I nearly fell off the rollers.  Such is the nature of getting oneself back into "race mode."  Suffice it to say -I felt rusty.

As I rolled up to the start, Longo asked me "where are all the women?," to which I replied, "well maybe they are winding down their seasons and are burnt out?," to which she said "but worlds are coming up . . . ?"  I didn't have the heart to tell her that not all female racers are in her universe of worlds-prep. 

Off I went.  She started 1 minute behind me.  My goal was to hold her off as long as possible, which ended up only being 7.5 miles.  I kept her on a short leash till about mile 10, at which point she flipped her NOS switch and dusted me.  She finished in 39 minutes and change, I finished in 42 minutes and change - 3 minutes lost over 17.4 miles.  My Garmin said my avg speed was 25mph, not bad but not awesome. 

After I got home I brought myself to do something I'd been putting off since my crash: I dug out my race jersey with the cascade numbers still pinned on, out of the corner I'd thrown it in, and unpinned the numbers.  The jersey is scuffed and there's a nice hole at the back of the neck where I skidded - but otherwise intact.  Like me I guess - scraped but generally intact and ready for more action. 

8-18-11: 3 weeks post op:

 . . . tomorrow is my first race back, which just so happens to be one month since I crashed on July 20.  Amazing how quickly the human body can heal, and how resilient it is.  I've come a long ways in a month - mentally and physically. 

8-17-11: slight setback today.  While riding and stopped at a red light, I was stretching my neck (sore from descending for awhile) and as I rotated my head I heard a loud POP in my collarbone and felt a sharp pain - I think I yelped out loud.  What the !?!  I made my way home and texted Rob in a panic: "I think I just messed up my collarbone."  He spoke with my doc who said pops like this are normal, albeit painful - often an adhesion forms on the muscle where it lays against the bone and forms scar tissue --an adhesion.  When I stretched, it broke the adhesion free.  It didn't feel nice, and is still painful now -- I guess inflammation follows when this occurs because scar tissue does have blood supply -so when it's pulled from surrounding tissue, the tissue bleeds a little and gets grumpy, as I call it.  nope. that's not what happened. Xrays confirmed -I rebroke it -er, popped one part of the bone free off the top of the screws.  DAMMMMMMNIIITTTT!!!!!

8-15-11: it's that time of the season ... when riders look for a team and teams look for riders for the following season.  Always an interesting experience when I was a director, and proving to be just as interesting now that I'm a rider.  Some hard lessons have been learned -about "friendship" (often fictituous in this sport), working hard off the bike for a team (and how it isn't valued, apparently), and the realities of my naivete in these circumstances, thinking that if I take care of people they'll take care of me.  I'm not down though- if anything I'm super optimistic.  I've learned that closed doors always lead to new-and better-opportunities.  I'm going to work at racing healthy, injury free, choosing events that favor me, and doing so in a positive environment while representing sponsors I believe in, and who believe in me.  I won't be sold short and I won't be taken advantage of again, that is for sure.  And I can focus my energies on the true friends and disregard the rest - something I should've done long ago.  The sport of cycling truly is a microcosm of life, isn't it.

8-11-11: today is 2 weeks post-op.  Hard to believe, actually.  Even the crash is already starting to feel more and more like a distant memory.  I'm back to riding my bike like I used to, descending like I used to, and generally getting my head right on the bike again.  Still feel incredibly lucky for the way everything turned out -I hope I don't ever lose sight of that.  My scar looks like a papercut, it's amazing.  Dr. Rowland was very pleased with my progress and is personally satisfied (I think) that I was riding so soon after surgery.  This is the success story that all cyclists should have, if they'd only just use the right doctor!  (Oh and more good news, Rowland xrayed my thumb and it's not broken -just a ligament strain, it'll heal - thank goodness!). 

My next race is in 8 days. First race since the crash - just a time trial so no chance of crashing, but still looking forward to being back in competition-mode again.

Here's my new training motto:

"If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. It's the hard that makes it great.

-Tom Hanks

8-6-11: I've started to feel like myself again, especially just in the last few days.  I'm still struggling with those 2 cracked ribs, one in front and one in back, but have grown accustomed to their annoying ache ;) I also fear I may've broken or seriously strained my thumb in the crash and only now that the collarbone issue is behind me, have I really started to notice the thumb is still an issue - you don't realize how often you use them, especially to squeeze water bottles while riding!

As of today, just 10 days post-op, I've logged 276 miles (17 hrs) of training time on the bike. Not too shabby! I've got Dr Rowland and the folks at Panorama Ortho to thank for that, and my speedy recovery in general. In just a few more days I can start applying my Suuthe skin repair to the surgery site ... I know it will make my scar barely noticeable. Some day this will all just be a memory!

I feel very encouraged by the progress I've made in the last few days and am really enjoying my time on the bike. This entire experience has taught me to never take for granted how much I enjoy riding - how it makes me feel, and how much fun it is. Every workout is purposeful and intentional now ... amazing what a paradigm shift this whole experience has caused.

8-3-11: bandages came off yesterday, here's how the battle scar looks (hard to believe it took 12 stiches to close it but the doc did a really nice job and hopefully some day, this will just be a faint little scar!):

8-1-11: yesterday I celebrated 3 victories: one- I was able to put my hair in a ponytail again!  Haven't been able to do that since 7/20.  Was getting close to chopping it all off (though my husband was getting quite good at doing them for me).  Second - off the painkillers and back to ibuprofen.  Goodbye fuzzy brain! Third victory - 50 mile ride just 3 days post-op:  

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/43979662">MapMyRide Jul 31, 2011 1:20 PM</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Golden, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Golden, CO</a>

7-29-11: surgery was a success! Check out my new hardware:

Today I sat on my trainer for an hour, wow did that feel good for my restless legs!  I feel like I'm well on my way to recovery and can start to refocus on my goals for this fall. 

7-26-11: made it home--that 1200mi solo drive one handed was no fun. but it's behind me. today i saw the pros at panorama ortho and surgery is the only option -it's too broken and w/a couple small pieces that need to be screwed back in, a plate is the only way to go; letting it heal on its own will only cause me more problems down the road.  so -surgery it is.  i'm told the pain relief will be immediate once things are back where they belong and that i'll be back on my bike w/in days. good thing b/c i'm going stir crazy after not riding for a week already.

... in talking w/other racers and directors, I believe my crash was totally preventable. the men's race was ahead of us and 30 guys piled up right near the 10 mile marker. (not sure why). their crash left a bunch of bottles and debris on the right side of the road. as we descended towards that spot, I was on the right front side of peleton. i saw a moto trying to kick the bottles off the road and then he ran to his bike to get it out of the way before we came on him. i guess the director he rode actually cut off the front left corner of our group, causing everyone to swing right. at the same time, the right hand side of the peleton was trying to move left to avoid the bottles. i was right in the sweet spot of left vs right mvmt and the girl on my left fell or swerved into me. not sure why my front tubular came off the rim but it did and popped and then i crashed (gwen recalls hearing my tire blow before she heard the crash).

the sad thing is, according to another director -the entire caravan knew of the debris and the men's crash 2 minutes before the women's race arrived in that area. so if we'd been allowed to wear radios, our director could've told us about it and we could've avoided it before it happened. argh.

i was lucky though -this was the first year the race has ordered an ambulance to follow the women's race on this stage.  they were on me w/in a minute. blessing -because we were over an hour's drive from bend.  also -blessed to have hal, our interim director, there on the scene in seconds -he's a fireman/paramedic and he knew what to do and he stayed cool as a cucumber while i completely lost my wits:

(pics from the scene taken by our host/photographer who was riding in our team car):

I was also lucky to have been "mapping my ride" because it meant i had my cell phone in my jersey when this happened.  The EMT was able to call my husband en route to the hospital and after losing cell reception on the drive to the hospital, i was able to call my mom from the ER.  I didn't get any of my belongings until later that afternoon, like 7 hours later, so w/out my phone I could not have notified anyone of my location etc.  You can't imagine how important it was for me to talk to Rob and to my mom during this. 

I was also blessed because my host, Ellen, is a doctor who volunteers one day/week at the hospital.  She was within minutes of the ER and was there with me right as they admitted me -about the time I completely lost my composure/was scared out of my mind.  Having a friend in the ER during that chaos was huge. 

So you see ...there are silver linings.  Everything about this experience could have been much worse.  I am very lucky.

7-22-11: bad news... i crashed hard on a descent out here in bend on day 2 of cascade (wed).  I was released from the hospital yesterday. My pneumothorax had not worsened so they feel my lung will most likely not collapse but it is still a risk for a bit. my Collarbone is broken and displaced but not urgent so I will see the pros at panorama back home to evaluate options when I get back. 2 broken ribs caused the pneumothorax and hemothorax (blood and air in cavity around the lung) on my left side. Makes it hard to breathe but I have to work on incentivespirometer (sp?) To keep lung capacity from shrinking. Good times :)

I Hit back of head really hard-cracked helmet and have good sized egg on my head. Rash on shoulder, good chunk on elbow and hip. I'm so lucky I didn't land on my face and for that I'm truly grateful.

They back boarded me and took me by ambulance. They did ct scans of head neck and xrays of chest collarbone back and pelvis... They did 2 more chest xrays to watch my lung. I didn't sleep a wink my night there-- it was so noisy!

resting up here in bend before i start my drive back to denver this weekend, i cant wait to be home.

7-16-11: just the scratch race for me today.  the absence of a podium photo here is sufficient commentary.  I second guessed myself at a critical moment in a critical move and i paid the price.  lesson of the day: trust thyself.

7-15-11: Checking in from Portland OR after day one of the AVC. Some of you recall that I came here last year for the first time and learned a LOT of things the hard way, not to mention the entire trip itself was the trip FROM HELL.  To recap:

-drivers side window shot out with BB driving thru WY en route to OR

-semi in front of me caught on fire

-cell phone stepped on in infield at AVC -no longer functional

-chain fell off not once but 2x during 500m race, resulting in my DQ and also me looking like an idiot careening around the track w/out brakes or a chain to stop myself

-making it to Bend and racing cascade, and having some success there, only to have team implosion while icing legs in the Deschutes river. 

-final day of cascade flatting brand new tubular wheel when I hit a chuck hole after making selection.  Result: DNF.  Cry.  Drive home feeling like failure.

-on drive home, baby swimming pool flew off the back of a pickup truck right at my car on the interstate

End result: by the time I got home I was just grateful to have survived.

luckily... this year is off to a MUCH better start!!  Today was the 3k pursuit - an individual timed effort for 12 painful laps. I chose a MUCH bigger gear than I have historically ridden in this event because the goal is to move towards a bigger and bigger gear.  The pursuit begins from a dead stop and so the struggle is to get going in that giant gear in the first few laps, but not to overcook it too early.

The Alpenrose track is rough -bumpy, nearly sea level in humidity, and outdoor. So -those things combined make it a "slow" track. For example -the velo record for 3k is a 3:57 - which is quite a slow time in the scheme of pursuits.

I haven't done a pursuit since Feb so this was a true test in many respects. The ride went smoothly, I never felt I was losing the gear and I finished 5 seconds faster than my time here last year -woot woot! Especially in a gear much bigger than I have historically used. Unfortunately I didn't have the fastest time of the day and so ended up 3rd.  I chose to skip the 500m event this year so the pursuit was it for today.

I have driven 1300 miles already on this trip and there's a lot more yet to come.  Didn't I say just last month that I'm too old for road trips? 

7-11-11: whew, that weekend wore me out!  Saturday Rob and I volunteered all day at his team's criterium, the BRC crit, in Highlands Ranch.  My race was at 3:40 and lately, the rain storms have been moving in around 3pm and sticking around for the night.  Sure enough -during our race with 5 laps to go, the skies opened up and poured on us.  I told Kasey at the start that if it rained I would be pulling out of the race to stay safe (we've got big stuff coming up!) and sure enough, I stayed in one more lap in the rain and then pulled off the course.  Kasey did awesome in the rain, sticking it out for 3rd place.  But wow the whole day in the sun really zapped me, I was toast!

Sunday morning was my 3rd and final coached ride with the Wheels of Justice group.  I rode to Superior to meet up with them, we did a loop of the Morgul road race course, and then I rode back home.  By this point I was feeling pretty tired and wondered how I'd feel for the North Boulder Park crit at 4pm in Boulder.  On the drive there, the dark omnious clouds rolled in and I almost didn't even register because I thought we'd get rained on and the course is too technical for me to consider racing wet.  But -I registered and hoped for the best...

Amazingly enough, the skies actually cleared just before our race, leaving us with this sultry heat and sunshine.  Oof - it was hot. But I have to say --this race is one of the coolest in CO and one of my favorites ... it is promoted so well, and it draws out huge crowds because of all the family activities and large race fields. The course is exciting with an uphill s/f and a technical backside through an alleyway with 2 tight turns. Primal was actually a large sponsor of our women's race and offered a solid payout, so it drew out the racers even with the rain threatening to start up again.

Right at the start I was first to clip in and went to the front to string things out. Shortly thereafter the attacks started, usually on the uphill portion, and Kasey and I took turns countering one another and countering off prime sprints. With about 25 minutes to go in the race, a small group of 5 of us got separation off the front of the field following an attack up the hill. However no one wanted to work to make it stick. So, I attacked the group and one other rider - super strong veteran racer Kori Seehafer -came with me. I knew Kasey would be back in the field blocking her heart out for me and sure enough -she was -and it made all the difference for Kori and I. The field initially tried to chase and then dissention among the riders caused our gap to open up.

We eventually had 40 seconds on the field and I focused on the finish. Kori is a strong sprinter and I knew she would get a jump on me. Sure enough - final lap, 2 corners out, she jumped. I was right on her wheel but she just kept accelerating and I had to work hard to stay on her. As she went uphill towards the line I moved along side her and we sprinted it out -- I could tell I'd need every inch of real estate to get her and I threw my bike at the line just edging her out for the win.

Kasey did an amazing job taking 4th place after all her blocking work for me during the race. Phenomenal team work.

Best of all, our team director -aka BOSS -was on site with some of our amazing team sponsors and they were all able to witness our teamwork and the win. It was great to share that moment with the people who make it all possible for us to race our bikes!!!

7-4-11: happy 4th! What a wonderful restorative, restful weekend.  Skipped all the racing options in order to ground myself here at home.  I LOVE my home.  I love to be home, to play in the garden, to just "dink around" on home stuff.  Buying our dream house a few years ago sure has made it harder for me to travel because I hate to leave home ;)  But I'm so grateful to have a basecamp that I enjoy so much and it was my agenda this weekend to just enjoy being here, away from bike racing and travel and stress.  I emerge ready to take on all of the travel ahead of me this month, and over the next 6 months. 

6-30-11: trounced myself pretty good in the heat yesterday on a nice long ride w/solid climbing.  I ended up stopping 3 times for bottle refills, it was HOT!

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/39327942">MapMyRide Jun 29, 2011 2:12 PM</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Golden, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Golden, CO</a>

6-28-11: oops a bit behind on wrapping up my weekend recap.  First off, Mark Wolcott did an amazing job taking pics of the event-check em out here.  Here are a few he shared with me:

   

Sunday featured stages 2 and 3 -the crit and TT. I raced the crit hard. Attack attack attack was my theme, especially with the cat 1/2/3 field combined, Primal/Treads had like 10 girls gunning for me. I wasn't going to race defensively, I wanted to put on a good show for the spectators and I wanted to race HARD! With the time bonuses offered during the crit, it ended up that I was tied on time with the rider in 2nd place, so the TT was going to make or break the overall.

I got to the TT site and was promptly eaten alive by mosquitos. It was horrible, I was covered in welts! I couldn't ride my rollers because of that so had to settle for rolling around on the TT bike. I'd looked at my time from last year and my goal was to beat it.

The cross winds were brutal, often my bike was at an extreme lean/angle as I held it up against the wind with my disc wheel blowing me around. My 30 second girl was the one I needed to beat in order to take the overall win. I slowly began reeling her in. Just after the turnaround I caught her and then passed her. It was tempting to just settle in and finish but then I decided, no, I want to see how hard I can push it. I visualized the top 3 women who'd just crushed the field at TT nationals. I imagined the pain they were willing to endure and I put myself there, in the pain cave...I dug deeeeeeeeeep. This weekend wasn't just about good training, it was about discovering how much I was able/willing to suffer. My body felt wrung out but my mind was focused and in the end, my mind won.

As it turned out, I rode the 10mile course in 22:01, averaging over 27mph. My 2010 time was a 24:01. TWO MINUTES FASTER! (Now -everyone's times were faster so I think the winds were more favorable this year. But still, to shave off a chunk of time like that made me so happy). It showed me I've made progress this year, despite the ongoing struggle with my back and the sense that I'm still playing catchup.

So in the end, I was able to pull out the win for the 2nd year in a row at Dead Dog. The race is so well-organized and put together, it really was a shame the fields were all so small this year- I hope more racers will consider going next year. 

Driving home I thought about women I know who've been in major accidents, or who've overcome illness, or who've been dealt serious setbacks - when they've returned to cycling, it's like they came back 10x stronger.  I always assumed it was because they faced a moment where cycling was taken from them for good.  And once they got it back, they said "I've been through hell and I will never take cycling for granted again" and they were more motivated in training and racing and began to blow everyone away.  I get that now.  This spring and summer, I truly thought my racing days were over.  My back would be so painful on training rides I'd creep home in pain and feel like there was no hope.  I realized this back issue was something I'd have to live with forever, and I never know which day it will be good and when it will be bad.

What I do know, and what this back injury has taught me, is to never take the good days for granted again.  The days when I ride or race pain free are like gold to me now.  And when I feel good, the gloves come off and I SPEND IT ALL--it feels so good to race pain free and to spend all I have in that moment because I may not have another moment like it in the future.  I don't take racing my bike for granted anymore.  And it's amazing the depths you can reach when you realize you want something so badly and you don't want it taken from you ever again. 

I'm excited to see where I can take this new perspective as the season progresses.  I feel like I'm just getting warmed up. 

6-25-11: checking in from the exciting metropolis of Laramie, WY.  Today was stage 1 of the DeadDog classic.  I wasn't planning to race this event but after my stomach flu last week caused me to miss Dairyland, I added this race onto my schedule (because as we all know, we usually race harder than we train, and I'm not ashamed to admit I'll pay for good training in the form of racing -plus it's more fun!).  It comes at the end of a tough training week and I'm not cutting myself any slack here (did I mention we topped out over 10,500ft during the race?).  Nor are my competitors - the girls gave me a real run for the money today and it came right down to the uphill sprint finish. 

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/38812634">MapMyRide Jun 25, 2011 1:31 PM</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Laramie, WY">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Laramie, WY</a>

I managed to drag myself across the line first (translation, it hurt a LOT), gaining a 30 sec time bonus going into Stages 2 and 3 (crit and TT), tomorrow.  Hoping with proper nutrition and recovery I can survive!   

6-23-11: thanks to michael welker for this pic of my "attack" ;)

despite the fact that tonight's training crit at CSP was workout #2 for the day, I had a "no chain" kind of race, mixing it up with the p1/2 men and having a good time with it.  love it when the legs can still produce even when they're beat up from training!!

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/38626190">MapMyRide Jun 23, 2011 7:58 PM</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Golden, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Golden, CO</a>

6-17-11: this trip cancellation has been a very expensive lesson, indeed. 

Here's a recap of what I learned:

1.  Don't register for a race just to get host housing.  Get housing on your own through independent means.  When you can register for each race day-of and play how you feel, the weather, etc by ear, why part ways with big $ just for housing?  (In my particular case, I ended up having to get my own housing anyways so it was a big waste).  Promoters RARELY part ways with cash in hand.  This one especially hurts since I also pre-reg for this event last year and then couldn't go due to a work conflict.  So this particular race is making $ off me hand-over-fist.

2.  Book "up" a level on your flight -spend the extra $ to get a flight that allows free changes/cancellations.  I did this right.  Patting myself on the back.

3.  Don't book a nonrefundable/nonchangeable car through one of the online booking agencies.  May save you a bit of $ on the reservation but it literally cannot be changed, no matter what.  Well - a doctor's note and they said they'd consider it.  Better again, to spend the extra $ to get a reservation you can cancel anytime.  I'd never used this method before and I can say I'll never do it again.  

6-16-11: well doggone it.  I came home from MN with a stomach bug which I initially dismissed as being minor and I actually improved on Tuesday so I thought the worst was behind me.  Wednesday was awful; Wednesday night oh man I wanted to die.  Isn't the flu just the worst!??  My schedule was to leave Friday morning to fly to Wisc for Tour of America's Dairyland.  Lots of $$ invested in entry fees, rental, flight, etc. I wasn't invited to race nationals with our team so I wanted to represent us at the Dairyland series.  Plus there's great racing, great payouts, and sounds like loads of fun.  But waking up this morning and feeling badly STILL I had to get real about this and concluded there's no way I could travel when I can't keep any food down, I haven't ridden in 4 days and I feel completely wiped out, no energy.  I HATE bailing on a race when the plans are all made and the money's been spent to go.  But one thing I've learned as a cyclist - you have to listen to your body and if you don't and you push harder, it will rebel against you even more-so. 

The upside as Rob said, is that I've hit an all time record low race weight ;) I should go find a climber's race (haha).

6-14-11: Here's a video of Bob Williams, promoter extrodinaire, showing recaps of the weekend:

And -Minnesota Bike Festival's website race recaps:
http://www.naturevalleybicyclefestival.com/Fixed-Gear-Classic/June11-Results
http://www.naturevalleybicyclefestival.com/Fixed-Gear-Classic/June12-Results

6-12-11: holy moly somebody pinch me!

Never in my wildest dreams did I come to Minnesota this weekend thinking I'd go home with the overall endurance omnium win.  never.  Today's races: tempo and madison.  I took 2nd in each (many MANY thanks to madison partner Maddie Godby for helping get that 2nd in the madison!).  It was close right down to the last race.  I feel like we put on a good show this weekend and can't say enough praise about the NSC Velo and the folks that put on this fabuluous event.  Stellar competition too!! 

6-11-11: checking in after days 1-2 here at the fixed gear classic in Blaine, MN.  This is a 3-day track race that brings in stellar national talent.  It is also the first track race for me since February's world cup in Manchester!! Literally the first time back on the track since Feb.  Needless to say i was NERVOUS to get back on the fixed gear bike and the banked turns ;)  I was also nervous about the stacked field, which includes several national champions and women just generally known for their track racing results.  The rest of my road team is down racing Tulsa Tough and while I hate not being there with them, this event is really important for me to test my track fitness and saavy early in the track season.  Some of you may recall I raced this event last year and I learned just about EVERYTHING the hard way.  Wow did I learn it.  Well ...the difference a year makes ;) 

Last night we raced the missnout qualification race -top 12 moved on to the missnout final.  I raced it to my plan and moved on no prob.  Then the rain began and racing was stopped for the night, with the rest of friday's schedule moved to this morning... Missnout has historically been an event I struggle with, and I ended up 7th.  I was pleased with this result--it was EONS ahead of last year's missnout when I was the FIRST RIDER eliminated!! 

Next we raced the 60-lap points race.  Every 10 laps we sprint for points (5,3,2,1) and person with most points at the end, wins.  You really have to pay attention and listen to the announcer to determine who has how many points.  I LOVE points races because it involves going hard over and over again.  Mid-race, I got off the front with Jen Triplett and we ended up taking a lap on the field (20 pts).  When we regained contact with the field I went straight to the front and a bit later attacked and ended up lapping the field again solo, taking another 20 pts.  This gave me the WIN in the points race YAHOO!!!! 

The 3rd race of the day was the 40-lap scratch race.  Scratch is like a crit -first person to cross the line, wins.  Generally it's a strong sprinter that wins from a field sprint in these races.  Long story short I was able to pull out another win -SOMEBODY PINCH ME!!

Last event of the day was the madison kilo - a 2person team event where the first rider does 500m for time, then we touch or exchange and second person does 500m.  Lowest combined time wins.  I am not a true sprinter, but my partner Maddie, is.  I led her out for the first 500m, then we touched and i took off on my 500m.  And guess what- -WE WON with a time of 1:09 !!!  Wow did not expect that one.

Racing continues tomorrow.  here are some pics my mom took of the racing action today:

missnout:

Points or Scratch -not sure which:

Madison kilo w/Maddie:

 

6-6-11: Saturday evening, Gwen, Kasey and I lined up for the first-annual ERock Crit, a race run in conjuction with the well known Elephant Rock Century.  This was my first foray into the streets of downtown Castle Rock -a really cute local community that came out to show its support of bike racing.  Because it was a twilight crit, the wind was a-blowing like crazy when we started at 6pm.  This made it really hard for breaks to get away - and not for lack of trying.  During the first 20 minutes of the race, Gwen, Kasey and I all launched attack after attack, trying to get off the front with one or two other riders.  Each time they were reeled in, the wind making it so hard to stick. 

I sensed a lull at the 25minute-to-go mark and attacked.  I was shocked to see I had a big gap and also shocked to see no one had come with me.  Gulp.  I settled into TT mode and watched the pack to see if there would be a chase.  Every time I looked back I saw the same rider (a former teammate of mine) on the front trying to bring me back, with the entire field sitting on her wheel.  It was obvious she was ready to throw her own race away just to see that I was caught.  My gap stayed right at 10 seconds and there was a lot of racing still to go.  It literally became a timetrial stand off between that rider and me - to see who would outlast the other.  Gwen did a nice job sitting second wheel on the chaser to help disrupt any kind of organization in the field.  Finally my gap grew to 12 seconds.  I kept my my head down and keep pushing and hope they would give up the chase but the gap just stayed tight and it was tenuous. 

Once we approached 5 laps to go, I looked back and saw 2 riders bridging up to me - Whitney Schultz and then Kori Seehafer.  Then Cari Higgins tried to bridge up to us but she never quite made it.  On the final lap, Whitney attacked early and I surged to her wheel.  This dropped Kori and it was Whitney and I drag-racing to the line.  I had just enough left in the legs for one final push to take the win at the line.  Kasey and Gwen finished 5th and 6th respectively with Teri Clouse taking the field sprint for 4th. 

We really appreciated the promoter offering equal payouts for the men and womens' pro races, and enjoyed putting on a good show in front of the spectators.  Photo of the "podium" with the Mayor of Castle Rock (apologies for poor quality, it was dusk and it was a phone camera!):

5-30-11: Daily Camera did a nice feature of the women's crit in Sunday morning's paper: http://www.dailycamera.com/cycling/ci_18165275?IADID

yesterday was stage 2 of the weekend. I got to start the stage wearing the hot pink leader's jersey, which was really cool after how things went down at this event last year.  It was huge on me but I didn't care, I was proud to wear it. 

Wasn't sure how my legs would feel climbing, since that hasn't been possible for me to do much with the back, needing to keep rides short and relatively flat.  Climbing also isn't a focus for my anymore, with my eyes on sprinting and more track-specific strengths.  So I was worried about 5 tiimes up "the wall" on sunday.  As it turned out, the legs felt fine.  The 2nd time up the wall I told Kasey to push the pace a bit and see what it did to the field.  Sure enough, she caused a seperation and she, Gwen and another rider got up the road while I worked to disrupt the field trying to get a paceline organized.  I was a bit bummed I didn't go up the road with them, as things in the field became very slow and it seemed the miles were just dragging by.  But I couldn't complain about the free ride, either.  Kasey easily took the win, Gwen 3rd and I managed to drag myself up that wall on the 5th time with enough speed to take 4th.  This meant as a team we:

Won the Crit.  Won the RR.  Won the Invidiual Omnium.  Won the team GC. Collected 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 8th places.  WOW.  Fantastic teamwork and fantastic racing, I couldn't be more pleased with how we raced and worked collaboratively.

 team GC

Indiv GC

hot pink leader's jersey 

5-28-11: today was a good day ;)  After the last ?? months of struggling with back pain, finishing races in tears or DNF-ing, feeling like I let my team and sponsors down ...and then to get back to being healthy only to crash out hard last weekend (landing on my head then doing an endo and smacking my back on the pavement) I was starting to wonder what I was being punished for.  Definitely days in there when I wondered if God was trying to tell me to hang up the bike.  After those types of weeks and months, today was so so sweet.  I think it is one of the sweetest victories for me because it marks a transition out of those rough days and a move towards new progress, new results and perhaps, a redeemed season. 

Today was the 2nd Superior Morgul Criterium, day 1 of 2 days of racing just up the road in Superior.  It is SO NICE to have a Memorial Day race so close to home.  We had a nice strong field of CAT 1-2-3 women today which included 3 of us from our Primal/MapMyRide team: Gwen, Kasey and myself.  We've developed the ability to read one another's minds in races after all this time together.  And I can't express how much fun that makes it to race.  On the 3rd or 4th lap the bell rang for QOM points on the next lap (Queen of the Mtn) which we wanted Kasey to take so she could start tmrw's RR in the polka dot jersey.  On the backside of the course I moved in front of Kasey to lead her out for the points.  As we rolled through the s/f we realized we had a gap and we just kept going, bringing one other rider, Cat, with us.

  When you roll off the front so early in a crit you don't expect it will stick.  We hovered right there w/in sight to the main field and I thought for sure we'd be reabsorbed.  But I just kept pushing the pace to see what would happen.  Meanwhile teammate Gwen back in the field was helping our cause, slowing in the corners and jumping on any move that tried to go.  PERFECT.  Her work is what allowed our break to stick.   

Our break went to 30 sec, then 40 sec, then a minute ...and then we actually started to gain on the field.  With 5 laps to go I attacked and got up the road solo.  Cat chased me, Kasey sat on her wheel with a free ride to the finish.  It was perfect teamwork.  I ended up sticking it and got to sit up and enjoy the win with arms in the air, goosebumps on my skin.  It is just the sweetest feeling when you can cross the line like that and soak it in.  For me, it nearly erased the suffering and frustrations of the last months ... my back felt great ... My teammates and I worked as a team with Kasey easily taking 2nd and Gwen taking 8th.  Life was good. 

Nice writeup about the race including some post-race interview quotes: http://303cycling.com/2011-Superior-Morgul-Bismark-Classic

and Boulder Daily Camera video: http://youtu.be/kZEl8qrKu54

Photos of the podium, posing with the Smith Optics car (our fantastic eyewear sponsor!) and with Breeze of Breeze Bars (our amazing nutrition sponsor!):

Tomorrow is the RR on the infamous Morgul Bismark course.  We have lots of cards to play, with Kasey and I sitting high in the omnium, her wearing the QOM jersey and Gwen climbing like a maniac lately .... stay tuned.

5-25-11: fantastic "no chain" ride today, legs felt good, I didn't get rained on, everything is so green thanks to all the recent rain storms.  Just an awesome day in the saddle.  Here's my MMR info:

<a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/35408558">MapMyRide May 25, 2011 3:09 PM</a><br/> <a href="http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/?location=Golden, CO">Find more Cycling Routes / Bike Rides in Golden, CO</a>

5-19-11: yes lots of blogging lately, perhaps due to the incessant downpour of rain here lately, I seem to have some spare time (which is not to say I'm riding less, because I'm still riding a lot but ...).  Today's blog is about one of my favorite things in life: coffee.  I discovered this article online today and smiled.  Something I love, previously thought to be a "vice," is actually good for me!  And of course the coffee that I've been avidly consuming for the past 3 years is even better because it's full of antioxidants!! 

 

Yup.  My Caffe Sanora Coffee provides antioxidant help to combat all those free radicals I produce in my body when I train hard.  How's that for awesome.  Previously only available online (caffesanora.com), it's now available in most grocery store chains (look in both the coffee and tea/juice aisles). 

5-18-11: i've been having an absolute blast working with my new SW4 gals -2 clinics down and they are picking it up so fast!  women interested in joining our team are always welcome to attend a clinic or ride to scope it out -here's the schedule of upcoming events: http://www.thecyclist-lawyer.com/events.  (and while you're at it, if you're on FB please "like" Hottman Law Office.  ;) 

5-17-11: since my last post, I received my 2nd cortisone shot in my spine.  Not a nice process to think about, but actually not so bad to endure thanks to amazing Dr Brown at Panorama Orthopedics in Golden.  The first shot: I was nervous.  Big needle in my back, what if ...  Second shot: I was like BRING IT I need to get this back pain GONE.  Then the process of sitting and waiting began.  You need to chill for a few days after said needle was in said spine, before you can start jamming on the pedals again.  During those days I also realized how much I needed a mental break from the bike.  And a mental break from the devastation of going on rides and hoping for a moment that maybe my back was better and then having my back start hurting and having to finish my ride in pain.  THAT cycle was old OLD.  So.  Bike down, back healing. 

I am very hesitant to say that my back is doing better -because over the past months, it seems every time I say that, it teaches me a lesson in pain and then I regret getting my hopes up.  But - I do feel good.  Which is encouraging.  And I'm still hungy for the bike - also a good thing ...    

5-10-11: home from speedweek, what a blast.  Joined teammates liza, nicky and tiff for the final 3 crits of the series in Spartanburg, Dillworth and Sandy Springs.  Was given the job of marking the moves, covering attacks and just generally being as much of a team helper as possible.  It's easy to throw my races away for teammates when I know they can-and will-deliver at the finish.  Nicky ended up taking 6th Fri nite, 3rd (PODIUM!) on Sat and 3rd (PODIUM!) on Sun.  This moved her into 3rd in the series overall and moved our team into third TEAM OVERALL!!  So we all got to share the podium as a team for the overall award:

My back was a serious issue on Fri and Sun, where the courses were technical with no chance to stretch or stand.  Saturday's course had a hill in it and that seemed to help, though I was dropped 1/2 way into the race after covering 2 conseq moves so maybe it was just being able to ride my own pace the second half that helped.  I'm beyond frustrated at this point with it.  Nothing I've done seems to be working.  I feel my optimism waning.  My teammates don't know if they can count on me because I never know when the back will start hurting in a race.  I hate being that rider that's not dependable.  It is no fun lining up to races with nervous anticipation - "ok when's the back going to start in on me today" worry.  I had such an amazing breakout season last year that I really hoped this season would build on that momentum, especially with my membership on this amazing team.  But instead I've regressed and it's just so darn hard and mentally and emotionally defeating I can't even express it.  These are the struggles of a bike racer. 

5-2-11: video blog update here

4-25-11: change in plans.  Last Friday I made the difficult decision to stay home and nurse this back problem I've been battling the past 6 mos, so that I can finally get well and have a solid 2nd half of my season!  In the past I have disregarded the advice of people who genuinely cared about me (husband, doctor, coach) and just pushed through the pain and I've learned that it never turns out well.  This time I am going to heed the advice of those individuals who said racing the Gila would not only make my back worse, it would set back my progress in getting it well, thereby setting back my season that much more.  It is never easy to sit the sidelines while the team is off racing and I really hate to miss the Gila.  I especially hate the feeling of letting my team down, knowing they were counting on me to be there (even if just for moral support).  But - sometimes you gotta know when to hold 'em and when to fold 'em.   My back is my top priority right now.  Still planning to join the girls for the final 3 days of speedweek May 5-8 if all goes well. 

4-20-11: as I catch my breath from our trip to Monterey I'm already packing and preparing for the next adventure which begins Monday - my 6th year racing Tour of the Gila in Silver City NM.  Hard to believe it's been 6 times already -I've seen it all, that's for sure.  From being so nervous I couldn't eat anything, to nearly being blown off my bike in 60mph winds, to making the lead group, to missing the lead group, to being behind crashes or going off the side of a climb to avoid a crash - I've got LOTS of memories from this one event.  It is an "endearing" (insert sarcasm) race in a quaint little mining town (quaint meaning small with walmart as the sole shopping option), wayyyyy off the beaten path.  Gale force winds, hot temps and hard racing have tended to be the norm.  With it being an olympic selection year and the return of K. Armstrong, it's sure to be one of the hardest years as far as the racing itself goes.  I'll again be playing the role of team workhorse now that we've got some speedy climbers on our roster, so my personal results won't matter so long as the team is kicking butt.  Not sure what to expect with my back but I know no matter what, there's gonna be some miles of suffering this year.  I'm ready.  Wish me luck.

4-19-11: our sea otter highlight reel --can you tell we had fun!? ;)

http://youtu.be/nKjoeO_mB30

4-18-11: home from sea otter, what a blast the week was but of course it always feels nice to be home, too ;)  Stage 3, the TT, went well for me -I didn't expect the back to cooperate with the TT bike position but it felt fine and I just gave it my all.  Sunday's circuit race - 18 laps gaining 280feet per lap (for all you math whizzes, that's 4480 feet gained in a 2 hr race!) it hurt just as I expected - a few laps into the race I led my teammate Emily out for the sprinter competition points and the effort really zapped me, I was dropped from the main group a few laps later but worked with a small chase group and was able to race the rest of the event except the final 2 laps.  I felt good about my contribution especially when I learned that Emily took the sprinter's jersey competition yahoo!  The back wasn't awesome but it wasn't awful, either... so.  A race that didn't end in a DNF and included some contributions to my team - I'm happy with that! 

4-16-11: many thanks to Todd at Caldwell Banker for this opportunity!

so...checking in at the halfway point of Sea Otter.  Thursday's criterium went well for us with Tiff taking 4th place. I got my first-ever callup at the start line (I think it helps knowing the announcer, none other than Mr. John Lefler from Nebraska!)

 

Personally I was encouraged with my back and how I hung in there relatively pain free until the very end, placing 18th.  This excitement came to a quick stop on Friday during the RR when, with 2 laps to go, the back again became a problem and I found myself struggling to just turn the pedals 'round to finish the race.  Argh.  The pain was radiating down my legs literally shutting off the power so I had to resort to standing, locking out my elbows and asking my hip flexors to pull my knees upward.  It wasn't pretty, but I finished.  My teammate Kasey who is our token "young'un" on the team was our top finisher-right up her alley, it ended on a nice 2 mile climb -so pround of how far she's come in just a year ... big things ahead for that one, just wait.

Amidst all the racing we've been chatting with our sponsors at the Primal tent and getting to connect with folks in the industry.  It's meant we are staying very busy, but it's fun and rewarding to be able to thank these folks for all they are doing for us.  Last night we hosted a happy hour at the tent and got to chat with all kinds of fans and industry representatives.  This morning our team did a short "ride with the pros" event which was open to anyone that wanted to join us.  Later today we race the TT and then tonight is a team dinner - SUPER FUN!!!  Tomorrow is the final stage, the circuit around the Laguna Seca raceway. 

Shown here: team car in front of team tent

4-5-11: compiled a fun video of highlights from Redlands with the team.  Click here.

4-2-11: this is the first time in my 8 years of bike racing that an injury is keeping me from doing what i want to do.  My legs are strong, I'm generating new power outputs in training and on the surface, things appear to have shaped up for my best season ever.  But like a time bomb, I've got this back issue that just won't go away and it reared its ugly head this weekend here in redlands.  I did fairly well in the TT, placing higher than I have the past 2 years.  Going into yesterday's road race I was assigned the role of protecting our top GC rider, Nicole.  She suffered a crash early in the race and I dropped way back to wait for her.  She was so far back that my director told me to get back up into the race, so I chased back on.  That was lap 1.  In the middle of lap 2 I dropped back to the team car to get bottles for the girls, since Liza (who was going to handle water) had suffered a flat early in the race and was off the back.  Once I got water to the girls and the climbing started, my back started up.  Agony!  Argh.  Dropped on lap 2.  Did 10-15 miles solo all the while working hard to stay positive.  Nicole eventually caught up to me and I tried to pull her towards the peleton but by that point was in too much pain and sent her up the road without me.  Minutes later, a small grupetto with Liza in it caught me and we all worked to get through the final lap.  I finished 14 minutes down on the leader's time- an all time new low for me.  So disappointing. 

Having survived the time cut, I was able to lineup for today's crit.  It is a techincal and FAST race for an hour.  Felt great until the 30 minute mark then BAM the back seized up on me and the curtain came down.  I went straight out the back of the group.  I had to survive 40 minutes but the ref pulled me at 37:40 and told me I cannot race tomorrow's sunset loop stage. 

Never -in 8 years of bike racing -can I recall being pulled from a crit and not making the time cut.  This really stinks, especially when my legs and lungs feel so great.  So i've decided this is a test.  I need to go back to the drawing board and keep working to get the back healthy and to keep working hard to keep my mind in a positive place.  I will get the best of this and when that back is finally healthy again LOOK OUT because I will be racing like a madwoman once i'm pain free ;)

3-30-11: all settled in Redlands, CA, excitedly awaiting the start of our first pro race of the year, the Redlands Bicycle Classic, which starts tomorrow with a TT/prologue.  I am staying in host housing with 2 of my teammates; our hosts are wonderful and have 3 adorable daughters.  The experience of host housing is always so fun and humbling -that these people would open their home to us, total strangers, for an entire week, while they are working, getting their kids to school, doing their daily routines - it really is incredible and I'm so grateful.  It really is a part of bike racing that I appreciate most - getting to know locals in the towns where we race, bonding with them and then staying in touch over the years.  What other sport does that!?

The weather is warm and gorgeous, our team is healthy and motivated and excited to race this event under the direction of our fantastic D.S. Susannah Gordon and also her co-director at this event, Tina Pic.  If you want to talk about coming full circle here ...2002 my mother took me to "this bike race thing" at Downers Grove, that her employer, the US Postal Service was hosting.  I watched Tina Pic win the race (her first of many national championships!!!) which then turned into me pursuing bike racing and entering downers grove the following year (my 2nd-ever crit!) ...and now -fast forward 9 years and I am racing under her tutelage ...wow exciting.  I pinch myself everytime this amazing new team presents these kinds of wonderful opportunities. 

So -tomorrow is the TT.  It's a tricky course, I've tried 2 different approaches to it but It is a course that favors the girl with the highest watts/kilogram -- so the perfect balance of low body weight plus high sustainable power output ... it's 10-15 minutes of pure intensity... wish us luck!!   

3-27-11: scored my first win of the season at today's DU criterium, held at city park in downtown denver.  This course is great because it has two technical spots, including a roundabout right before the finishing sprint.  I attacked on lap 2 and another rider came with me -we worked well together soon began lapping parts of the field.  Final lap I went to the front, hit the roundabout first and then dug in for the sprint.  Felt weird to race without teammates today, I missed my comrades in pink and black ;)  

I used mapmyride to record the race-check it out here.

3-25-11: I have found the cure for saddle sores!! 

And I'm really excited to have them as a sponsor!!   Mari created this amazing product for a really neat person: her son!!  I call it the miracle salve!  Works great for saddle sores, chamois/diaper rash, dry hands, chapped lips and more.  Not to be confused with chamois cream, this is the perfect post-ride application to use "down there" to keep skin soft and healthy so that day-to-day riding and racing can be pain free.  The chapstick is phenom -esp the peppermint, yum!!  And it is all 100% NATURAL.  Love it love it.  Can't wait to do more with this fantastic, local company.   

3-23-11: better than a helmet cam!  I use MapMyRide's app every time I ride - I turn on my phone, start the app, and it tracks my ride using GPS technology. SO COOL.  so today's ride was awesome -perfect weather, perfect route, perfect legs.  Love it when that happens.  I thought I'd share the map of my route (http://www.mapmyride.com/routes/view/30223588) so you can "see" the route - click on the 3D flyover video box in the upper right-hand corner of the map.  Allow your computer to add Google Earth to your system and then watch my ride from above.  Cool huh?!?

3-21-11: what a great weekend!  Friday I took part in the PrimalWear men's training camp, which consisted of a ride from Golden up to Boulder, up Flagstaff, and then back home.  Whew!  Saturday I rode up to Boulder again, this time to race the CU crit at Research Park. 

Had a blast in the 35-woman strong field tearing it up with teammate Kasey.  I finished 3rd, she finished 5th - great training and great results!

Then I rode home. Good stuff. 

Sunday, Rob and I joined the Mob ride which departed from the Golden starbucks and rode to Morrison and then south towards Lockheed Martin -some were going to do Deer Creek Canyon, but Rob and I turned around and came back towards home.  I "mapped my ride" all 3 days - and recently discovered the Google earth virtual route which shows the route from above - what a cool feature! 

After those tough days in the saddle, I am very much looking forward to my massage today at ProActive Chiro. 

3-18-11: I've been doing lots of self-study in the sports psych realm, and also working with my sports psych coach (amazing things we've been working on!)  I recently read a blurb about a baseball player who was asked how he handles the enormous pressure on him to perform and his answer was something along the lines of "basically, even if I totally blow this today, I know that the very worst case scenario is that I pack my bags and go home and see my family."  In other words, he knew his sports performance wasn't a matter of life and death, and seeing it in that light allowed him to reduce any self-pressure, which in turn helped him both enjoy his sport more, as well as perform to his highest ability. 

Today, my mom sent me a blurb along the same lines, and it's so true:

At a recent diving competition, an Olympic gold-medal diver was asked how he copes with the stress of competitions.  He responded by saying that he climbs to the board, takes a deep breath, and says to himself, "Even if I blow this dive, my mother will still love me." Then he goes for the gold!

3-12-11: first of many video blurbs about my amazing sponsors.  This one is about XING TEA, a Denver-based company.  Click here to watch. 

3-11-11: this saying really epitomizes the last week I've had:

"Give your dreams all you've got and you'll be amazed at the energy that comes out of you."  - William James

Whether it means devoting energy to sponsorships (and I recently signed 3 new ones, how exciting!), devoting energy to rides, to recovery, to nutrition, or to positive mental and emotional thoughts about my cycling goals ... no doubt, the more energy I pour into this dream of mine, the more energy I have!! 

I also enjoy investing my energy in the sport of women's cycling -- by bringing in new women each season.  That's why I recently formed this small team devoted to beginner female racers.  Please share the link with anyone you know who may be interested. 

3-9-11: after several days of cold and grey, the sun is shining today, birds are chirping and I can see the sprouts of my dafodils pushing up.  Hard ride on tap for the day, I can't wait to get to it!!

Here's a good read on women's racing: http://www.cyclingnews.com/features/international-womens-day-five-ways-to-improve-womens-cycling

3-7-11: I am really excited about my new partnership with .  They make super fast and super snazzy track wheels, which I can't wait to race this upcoming track season! is also a new sponsor that's joining me and my quest -they make hardcore beefy track chains-saweet!  My 2011 custom Primal track suits are almost done in the design department and will soon reach the production department ... new design, new sponsors, new season ... exciting things ahead!!!   

3-1-11.  holy cow it's march and it seems i was just wrapping up september.  all the camps, travel, racing, and training made the past 5 months absolutely RUSH by.  Scary in a way but the upside is, spring is here and I didn't have to endure much winter. 

My programs over the years have consistently had lots of hard miles, intervals and intensity.  One thing they've lacked -blocks of time off.  More or less it's been 7-8 years of year-round training on the bike with a day or two here and there off the bike.  Shameful, I know.  So, I welcomed this block of off-time with open arms and an open mind.  Yes I'll be rusty when I resume, but in theory, it's going to help me get that much stronger.  Cortisol levels: down.  Sleep: up.  aches and pains: gone.  Mental and physical time from the bike.  Challenging?  heck yes, especially when it's 60 and sunny out.  But I consider it an investment in my 2011 season -and it's a small sacrifice to make. 

2-22-11: home, catching my breath. loved the travels, loved all that I learned, loved meeting new people, trying new things, stretching my comfort zone...but love being home too.  saw this quote and really feel it summarizes the last 6 months for me:

"Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement.

One fails forward toward success."

- Charles F. Kettering

The World cups in a way, were failures.  My highest place was 14th -not exactly what I'd hoped for.  More importantely though, each of the 3 world cups were lesson books - small and large.  How to travel with all that stuff, when to travel, where to stay, what to pack, what to eat, when to train and when to rest, who to trust (and not), how to train -how to train harder, when to taper, and thousands more.  I wouldn't trade these last 6 months for anything.  You can't find a book called "World Cups for Dummies," so I did the only thing I know how to do, which is to fully immerse myself in the experience, shorten the learning curve, make lots of mistakes (looking like a royal fool at times) as quickly as possible, and then move on, an informed and educated individual.  I've come much further than I thought I would when back in September, I was looking ahead to Feb 2011.  My first-ever team pursuit was a last minute thrown together team at track nationals.  6 months later, I've attended numerous camps, trained with the best in the USA and have raced 3 team pursuits at the world cup level. 

Still -I fell short.  My results were far from stellar -though I posted several new Personal Bests, they were not competitive on the world stage.  Does this leave me a crumpled and defeated mess, saying woe is me, I can't do it, it's too hard, those athletes are too good, i'll never get there.  No, just the opposite.  My tunnel vision grows ever-narrower and stronger towards my goal, blocking out even more of the distractions and excluding anything that won't help me reach my potential.  My desire and work ethic and planning doubled after Manchester.  The wheels have been spinning since my arrival home and it gives me knots in my stomach, the anxiousness and excitement I have to accomplish the things I envision.  I have the capacity to double the effort, dig twice as deep, work 10 times as hard, leave nothing to chance, focus on every detail.   

I leave the winter track season and the world cups and the international best of the world a changed athlete.  I'm engaged and refocused.  It's awesome and it's powerful.  Many would look at my results and assume, "she came, she saw, she went, she's done."   ...  Nope. 

2-20-11: unfortunately, not good news to report regarding Saturday's scratch race.  I had to make it through the qualifier to move on to the final race in the evening.  I went with an early move and we were brought back.  With 3 laps to go I went up over the top of the field and then just drifted back too far.  I was too busy worrying about keeping 4 people behind me (only 12 moved on to finals ride) that I didn't focus on the race up the road and the lesson learned here was -race the qual full out because if you don't, you don't race the final.  I was really disappointed in myself, especially given that my legs felt strong and I could've given it more.  Expensive lesson.

So-since I wasn't racing Saturday night I got to enjoy watching the races from the infield.  This was the last one we stayed for and let me just say, this ride will go down in history as one of THE craziest!!   

Of the 3 world cups, I think this one was the most fun, primarily because we had local british men and women on the team and in the bin with team support -so I learned a lot more about the local scene, the local slang, got to experience a pint of local beer in a local dive pub, and all round felt I experienced more of the Manchester flavor -and had a TON of laughs with the group.  Was really proud of everyone for giving it their all - here are some pics of the week:

 Andy before his 200m

 barney & paul swinnerton

 Jess, Ruby, Lou and me

 TS guys: kev, miles and andy

 

2-18-11: team pursuit and team sprint are done!  the TP didn't go well for us -the main thing i wanted to avoid -namely, us coming apart as a team -happened (video coming soon). it wasn't pretty but well . . . anyways it's behind us and i'm looking forward.  the TS with Jess went better, we bested our Melb time, finishing low :37 time.  Of course the top teams went 33 or 34 seconds -and i know 3-4 seconds doesn't seem like much but in sprinting, it's eons. but -we are improving and that's the important thing.

tomorrow is the scratch qualifying race and if i move on then i'll race the scratch final later in the evening.  sunday morning I board a plane for HOME.  I cannot CANNOT wait to be home after this long month of travel. 

2-17-11: proud to be a CycleOps athlete!

2-16-11: a picture of the track here with an arrow to indicate where our bin is:

2-15-11: quick check in from manchester.  road camp/VOS was awesome -pics here

I arrived this morning in Manchester and had my first day on the velo here today w/new team pursuit teammates and we are set and ready to race.  more later.

2-10-11: checking in from phoenix where I'm with my new road team . . . Today we met with Chris at BH Bikes, based here in Phoenix:

Tomorrow, we RACE!!!!!!!!!!!

2-7-11: today I received the footage from our team pursuit ride at the Cali World Cup (12.18.2010): click here to watch.  Jen starts in the gate, Emy is in the middle, I am 3rd -black helmet. 

2-6-11: today the TP girls invited me to accompany them on a day trip/ride in Pasadena.  It was so fun!

2-6-11: yesterday the LA Velodrome promoted a day of track racing called the LAVRA Winter Classic.  It fell on a perfect day of camp such that I was able to sign up for the races and not miss any camp workouts.  The object of the day: use racing to train super hard and learn something.

The morning session consisted of the timed events - team time trials, 200m, 500m, 2,3 and 4k pursuits.  I was recruited by a men's 4kTP team that needed a 4th rider and was happy to join in -it served as a perfect warmup for my IP shortly thereafter.  I had an IP time goal in mind but fell short, even tho I rode the race in the manner I intended.  You may think a fast individual pursuit time comes from going out as hard and fast as you can and just holding on for 12 laps, but it's more complicated than that.  My time was still 4 seconds less than my nationals time so I was pleased. 

Then it was time to just hang out and relax before the afternoon session began at 330p.  At the track it's crucial to get out of the chamois, to find a quiet space, and to just relax with a book or by closing the eyes and "resetting."  Then about 45 minutes before the afternoon session, I re-kitted, re-warmed up and got ready for mass start events, 3 races run as an "omnium" (the best overall person, wins).   

First was the tempo - 15 laps where the first person of each lap gets one point and the final lap 3-2-1 points are awarded.  I ended up 4th.  Next -the 40 lap points race, where every 10 laps we sprint for 5-3-2-1 points.  Coming into the final 10 laps I had 6 points.  With 3 to go, I launched a solo attack and got away clean with a large gap quickly forming.  I held it for the 5 points, finishing the race with 11, taking 2nd place.  The Scratch race was last - 20 laps and the first person across the line, wins, there are no mid-race sprints.  I sat off the back for much of the race just watching and then 2 girls got off the front and took a lap on the bunch.  Within the final 3 laps another got off the front.  I ended up 6th.  I learned a LOT in this race -and I consider it progress that I'm to the point now where I can review the race in my head and pick out the mistakes I made AND know how I could have done it better. 

After being at the track for 12 hours (and not packing enough to eat!) I wanted to get outta there last night, so I didn't stick around for overall omnium results (I'm told I was 2nd, but it's not confirmed).  Pics from the day thanks to Dennis Junor:

 pursuit pain face

 mass start action

  

2-3-11: finally figured out how to take self vids, save on my phone and then send to myself for posting.  trick: gotta keep the file size small otherwise it won't work (ie keep the vid short and sweet!).  Click here to watch.

2-2-11: good news, the varmit saw his shadow today, so let's hope it means early spring!  as promised -here are some pics from my day at the velo today.  my cool bikes, my sweet new shoes and my pile-o-crap that seems to explode from my bag each day when i get to the track.

2-1-11: checking in again from my escapefromwinterwarmlocation, LA.  I have to say, when the -12 temps arrived in Denver, I was relieved to be escaping to 60 and sunny.  And -it's also going to be a very productive week of training.  From here I meet my road team in phoenix for camp, and then it's off to Manchester.  And that will mostly take care of February ;)  I promise to post more pics to add some color to all these words this month.  Hoping to have great stories and even greater results to share here shortly.

1-26-11: yesterday USA Cycling posted the 2012 olympic games selection process and criteria on its website.  Just the women's track document alone is 20 pages and it's detailed stuff.  Good to know where one needs to be in order to lay out a plan to get there!

"Life is either daring adventure or nothing." - Helen Keller

1-25-11: an interesting observation: when you look at the top female cyclists in the world, you find they don't have blogs and many aren't on facebook or twitter.  they may occasionally publish a carefully-written article or allow someone to interview them, but in terms of them just posting their thoughts or reactions to racing or other competitiors, etc - you just don't find it.  Which brings me to a question: why is this? Have they discovered that people will use their words against them? Have they learned through experience that it's better to fly below the radar and have people know as little about them as possible?  Do they simply not have the time or desire? I've concluded there's definitely a reason and I think it has alot to do with holding one's cards close to the vest, giving others little or no reason to speculate about any aspect of the athlete's life or goings-on.  "Familiarity breeds contempt," as they say.  It's ironic because those are the women I'd love most to learn more about -- and i'd enjoy reading about their trials and tribulations and perhaps save myself a hard lesson or two by observing their choices and their mannerisms. 

1-20-11: after a year of missing them, I'm really pumped to have CROCS back on my sponsor roster once again!! 

And they make plantar fasciatis-specific shoes, which is excellent since I've been struggling with PF lately!   

1-19-11: It's cool to see the USA TP program thriving!  (if you look closely, you can see me, I'm the 2nd rider behind the moto)  ;)  http://www.usacycling.org/news/user/story.php?id=5832

1-17-11: I have become the ice bath queen.  I've always sworn by them, but because they don't feel super great (ok they are painful -almost hurt more than the training does!), I haven't done them in a while- but boy oh boy do they make a difference!!!  I have alternated this week between standing in the ice cold ocean and filling my hotel room tub with ice.  I realized that filling a few pots and pans with water, freezing it and then putting those huge chunks of ice, into the tub, works perfectly! (beats buying bags of ice every time). 

1-13-11: back in LA this week, for what may potentially be the final trip here this winter (5 trips, wow!,) for a team pursuit camp and some solid road training before I go into the final prep mode for my last world cup of the winter.  I know I've said this a lot, but what a steep learning curve it's all been, all winter long.  As soon as I think "I'm starting to get a handle on this," nope -something new pops up and challenges me all over again.  In that respect, it's new, it's exciting and fun to learn, and I've always known that I thrive with challenge.  It's not all rosy and some disappointments are difficult to swallow but hey - if this was easy, everyone would be doing it ;)  (right?).  I'm so encouraged by the gains I've made just since September.  Our time standard tests this week revealed serious progress from my times back in November at camp.  Some improvements take more time than others, but for me I know that what I've seen is just the tip of the iceberg.  And that's really exciting. 

1-11-11: some great pics from our team weekend are posted here!

1-7-11: spending the weekend with my 2011 road team!!  Come and meet everyone on Saturday it'll be fun!  Details here. 

1-4-11: bike for sale!

1-3-11: this blog is to share my appreciation and kudos with readers for a positive customer service experience I had today.  The staff and Dr. Brown and his crew at Panorama/Golden Ridge Surgery Center -- wow.  Fast, friendly, effective, painless - overall an excellent experience.  I really can't say enough about them and in fact, I laughed a lot while there (good time at a doc's office, go figure!)  Sincerely -world class service and I'd recommend them to friends and family for any orthopedic needs!!!

   

1-2-11: happy new year! 

Snow still covers most of the roads and it's been so darn cold here it doesn't look like it'll be melting anytime soon . . . so it's been indoor training for me as of late.  I started a solid trainer session yesterday but about an hour into it I began to struggle.  So I hitched a ride with hubby up to the Boulder velodrome where we knocked out a solid training session together.  We finished with kilos, using the timing chips and all.  He rode a 1:07 and I rode a 1:09, beating my previous best of 1:10.  (remember, it's not a real kilo there so the times are only relative to kilos done at this track).  It is so nice to have that indoor track option available to us! 

2010 blog postings here